SUFFER WITH ME Read online

  Benji rides up to the ninth floor still fuming from his encounter with Detective Adams. He never pegged her for the judgmental type, but looks can be deceiving. He tries to mentally get back where he was before his unexpected collision.

  Suffiyah kicks herself as she watched the elevator stop on the ninth floor. The building frustration of the past weeks, were spewed at the first person she encountered. Alicia’s assessment coupled with her own distaste for drug dealers, fueled her outburst. She found herself on the elevator again and sitting in the back row of the courtroom in minutes.

  “…so being that one camera on the store sees Weequahic Avenue and the camera on the apartment building, facing Clinton Place, never captures their likenesses. It would be impossible for the statement that the officer gave to be plausible. If he was indeed sitting in Dunkin Donuts parking lot on Lyons Avenue, as I sat, and watched the defendants as he said, they would have to be on either camera. Physical evidence doesn’t correspond with his reports.”

  Suffiyah exits the courtroom as he’s dismissed from the stand. When he comes through the door, his face registers surprise and then displeasure as he attempts to push pass her.

  “Wait! I apologize.” Suffiyah says pleadingly. The man stops and looks at her. “I’ve been having the worst week and I unfairly took it out on you. It was unjust of me to form an opinion on you with no facts to back it. You only get one chance at a first impression and mines was an utter contradiction to who I truly am. So will you grant me the opportunity to buy you lunch and replace your assessments of me and my preconceived notions, with better ones. Please?” And with that she smiles. If he had any qualms about her request, the sincerity in her smile deleted them.

  “Apology accepted. Benji Cooper,” he says, extending his hand.

  “Suffiyah Adams,” she replies accepting his clasp gently.

  “Let me take that for you,” He offers, taking her belongings.

  “Thank you. Even though I don’t deserve the chivalry, especially after my performance.”

  “Nonsense. Every woman is deserving of at least one chivalrous act in her lifetime.”

  Benji cuffs his shirt sleeves up on his forearms before digging into his food.

  “I’ve honestly never come in here,” Suffiyah admits as they sit in Queens 2 Pizzeria on Halsey Street.

  “You’ve been cheating ya self. This the best pizza in Newark, hands down. It used to be across the street on that corner,” he says, pointing out the window. “But I guess that building was too dilapidated for them or the move was part of the gentrification that’s taking place down here.”

  “So, since you aren’t a drug dealer. I’m gonna take a wild guess and say you’re Newark’s official tour guide. Am I right?” she jests.

  “Ha ha.” Benji laughs putting a napkin to his mouth to prevent food from flying out. “So you cute and funny? Nah. But on the real I’m a private investigator. I do mostly freelance work for law firms, but I take on pro bono cases on hate crimes, kidnappings and rapes. Things of that nature, for families who can’t afford my services. But I also have another business that I’m not entirely comfortable with disclosing at the moment,” confesses Benji.

  “I love how you flip the switch. You speak ‘hood when you want and in the same breath you make the transition and speak like a professor with little effort. I don’t know if you remember but I saw you in the mall, staring at me,” she mentions, rolling her eyes playfully.

  “I was actually looking at your friend,” Benji interrupts.

  Embarrassment flushes Suffiyah’s face as she regrets her assumption. She doesn’t know how she didn’t consider he was looking at Lee Lee. “Well, I, you see-“

  “See, you’re not the only one who knows how to be funny. But I was looking at you though.”

  She narrows her eyes and flicks her straw wrapper at him. “Anyway! I swore I had you pegged as being in the streets.”

  “Why?”

  “Your aura reeked of the gutter. You looked like a dapper hood rat,” she kids.

  “What about now? What does my aura reek of at the moment?”

  “Honestly? Even after hearing you on the stand and talking to you now, your demeanor oozes the streets. It’s in your movements, your lingo, your posture and even your eyes. They’re like hard and soft at the same time, how? You’re an enigma.”

  “An enigma? Okay, well I’m gonna stick around and let you try to figure out the riddle of Benji. Well, that’s if you feel up to the challenge?”

  “Challenge accepted.” The rest of the lunch went perfectly.

  Suffiyah sticks her key in the door and enters the living room. Lee Lee sits on the couch Indian style reading a book. Suffiyah spends majority of her week here after the tire incident. She can’t divulge the situation she’s placed Lee Lee in, but she can stay to protect her from it.

  “Let me have some,” Lee says as Suffiyah lays her head on her lap.

  “Some what?”

  “Of the money.” Lee Lee states matter-of-factly.

  “Lee Lee, if you smoking crack, we gonna fight,” she jokes. “Now what money?”

  “It has to be money. This morning you left out looking as miserable as a dog with worms. Tonight though, you walk in showing all 58 teeth and gums. So I figure you had to hit the lottery. Now give me some or stop smiling like the Cheshire Cat.” They both giggled. “How was your day though, Sufee? You look much better.”

  “Good, Lee. No, great actually. He’s not a drug dealer.”

  “He’s not?”

  “Nope.”

  “Well, that’s good. Now, let’s stop playing ‘fill in the blanks’, because I don’t know what you talking about and you got me fucked up like a black man in Nazi Germany.”

  “Where do you come up with the things that you say?” Suffiyah laughs. She goes on and tells her the details of her day. By the end of the story she’s excited as a kid on Christmas morning.

  “That smile is contagious, Sweetie. So what you gonna do about Dr. Love?” Lee Lee asks.

  “Dr. Jackson’s cool. But he’s too extra cute for me. He looks like the type who I’ll have to compete for the mirror with every morning. But Benji on the other hand, is cute by default. It’s like he’s not even trying. At first glance you like, ‘He’s alright.’ Then he starts talking. His vocabulary? Superb! Not like he just heard a word and used it, but he actually understands it. He’s so articulate. What makes it that much more attractive is he’s from the number blocks. Smack dab in the middle of the ghetto! Yet he still grew beautifully, like the rose in the concrete. Do you know how strong that rose has to be to bloom from the harsh, coldness that is the concrete and still retain its essence?”

  “Strong enough to hold your heart?”

  “Exactly.” Suffiyah snuggles into Lee Lee’s lap as she plays in her hair and slowly drifts into slumber.

  CHAPTER 7

  A little girl cowers in the corner of the attic, as the monster frantically searches for her. She silently prays to God that he doesn’t look behind the boxes of clothes stacked in front of her. “Suffer! Suffer!” he screams as he flings objects out of his path. “Here you are!” But his voice is coming from across the room, directed at someone unseen. “Now you must suffer with me.” The girl peeks from behind the boxes as the monster lifts someone by the collar. “Where is she?” the monster barks. She sees a little finger point in her direction. The monster turns…

  Suffiyah wakes up, her heart beating erratically. She looks around expecting to be in the attic. To her pleasure, she’s in the bedroom. The clock reads 2:00AM. Zzzzzz Zzzzzz, her phone vibrates on the nightstand.

  “Hello?” she answers the private number.

  “I’m so glad we have come to this understanding, Suffiyah,” came the voice. “I was so tired of killing. I‘m glad you’re finally mine. Come open the door, I’m here.”

  Suffiyah has given herself over to the killer in exchange for him to cease the murders. S
he walks to the door and unlocks it. Pulling her door open, she looks down the hallway which is empty.

  “I’m here.”

  “So am I. Look down.”

  She looks at the floor and her phone drops to the ground at the same time she does. Suffiyah gathers Lee Lee’s naked body in her arms and shakes her as she cries. Lee Lee’s eyes open slightly as she reaches out for Suffiyah, and wraps her hands around Suffiyah’s windpipe and squeezes.

  “Sufee! Sufee!”

  Lee Lee shakes her awake. It takes a moment for her to realize where she is.

  “What’s wrong Lee?”

  “I don’t know. You was the one screaming my name in your sleep. I thought somebody was breaking in. I was ‘bout to jump out the window and leave you.” Lee Lee smiles while reaching out to touch Suffiyah’s sweat soaked forehead. “You wanna talk about it, Su?”

  “No, don’t worry I’m good. Go get some sleep. We’ll talk in the morning, okay?”

  “Kay, goodnight.” Alicia turns out the living room light on her way back to her bedroom.

  Riding the high from his last two successful murders, the killer feels he’s entitled to a little celebration. But what? Nothing gives him greater elation than coupling with a woman and enticing her to suffer with him. But he’s not naïve enough to believe that he can keep committing the crimes so closely together. If he’s believed to be a serial killer too early, the heat will be turned up considerably. So maybe he’ll just go on BackPage and find a companion for the night. For a couple of well-placed coins, there is nothing one of these women won’t do. Isn’t it funny how a flimsy green piece of paper can make most humans compromise their morals? Everyone has a price tag in his opinion, you just have to know where to look. Which lands him in Wet, a gentleman’s club in Belleville. Standing against the wall he observes all the dancers prancing around in G-strings. He traded in his earlier dress clothes for a grittier, urban look. In his work clothes, he would have stood out like a sore thumb in this crowd. He swapped his dress shirt for a form fitting thermal shirt on top of which he wore a Pittsburg Pirates team jacket. His slacks exchanged for a pair of black Robin jeans and on his feet a pair of black and yellow Jordan 1’s. The three day old stubble on his usually clean shaven face gives him an edgier look. He now resembles every other drug dealer who frequents this establishment.

  “Can I get three hundred singles?” he says passing the bartender fifteen twenty dollar bills. He did it in a manner to allow the dancers to see the contents of his pockets. As if on cue, a pretty Spanish girl starts strutting in his direction. She wears a money green G-string with money green pastie stars over her nipples. Her body glistens in the low lights. Dressed up somewhere in the world, she’d be perfect for the title of wife. But in this den of sex and intoxication her title never exceeds prey.

  “You watching me, Papi?” she ask sultrily as she pushes her breast into his lower chest.

  Looking up in his face for any signs or desperation or thirst, she sees none. The stripper known as “Allure” is use to men openly drooling over her. Gawking at her model beauty and naturally toned thick body. In a world of plastic filled copies, she’s an original. As he looks down at her face with an expression that says, “He can do with or without her company”, her spider senses started to tingle. This is a man of some means, financially. Unlike most of the rest of the dudes in here with their last $300 and the pipe dream that it will land them a night with a world class vixen, such as herself. Turning her aggressiveness up ten notches, she pulls herself forward by grabbing his coat. With her lips pressed to his earlobe, she whispers.

  “Damn Pa, I’m not pretty enough for you?” Her aroma is like fresh fruit and soap topped with the heady scent of sexuality. “Que pasa?” Allure asks nipping his ear erotically as she backs her face up, while allowing her thigh to brush his manhood. This pulls a smile from him as she feels his hands grip her waist. He was caught up in her “allure”.

  Allure tip toes through the hotel room collecting her clothes. She looks over the bed and considers straddling his naked body and giving him a freebie after last night’s sexcapade. But she has to get home to her daughter. She’s probably going to be hoarse in the morning from the way he was choking her, but for a thousand dollars for the night, she would have let him punch her in the eye.

  “Somebody had a date last night, huh?” Suffiyah asks.

  “If a date was work, then yeah. An all-nighter. You checkin’ for me?” Benji asks her.

  After their lunch date they’ve been speaking by phone regularly. “Nah not checkin’ for you, just checking on you. I called you like three times last night.”

  “I fell asleep on the sofa in my office. I apologize for missing your call. I saw it when I woke up at like 3:00am, but I would never intrude on your night like that, so I waited until now.”

  “I was up. I couldn’t really sleep. You ever been to Top Golf?”

  “No, where is it?”

  “Edison. How would you like to meet me and Lee Lee, there?”

  “Sounds cool. So that’s why we haven’t had a date, no chaperone?”

  “Ha-ha, yeah something like that. But look call me later, okay?”

  “Got ‘chu. Later.”

  Suffiyah crisscrosses her toes over each other as she finally tinkles. She ended the call because she didn’t want him to hear the toilet flush. That would have been embarrassing. What if he would have assumed she was defecating? Not really the vision of her that she wants in his head. She was so excited to see him call, she hurriedly pressed accept before realizing that she was on the toilet. She finishes her business and washes her hands before leaving the bathroom. The morning looks so beautiful and peaceful. Suffiyah lifts the blinds all the way up to enjoy the view. It’s funny how detached a picture can be from the actual griminess that surrounds it. Looking at the world from a window makes you want to become part of the beauty and live the scene. Until you enter the portrait and experience all the unseen ills that inhabit it. Then the only thing you wish to do is run back to your looking glass and away from the actuality. It’s so much easier to watch life then it is to live it. As Suffiyah comes out of her thoughts, she notices most of the passersby are looking in her direction. Some are smiling, a woman shakes her head, and an older man gives her the thumbs up. For about five seconds her face is a mask of confusion. She suddenly snatches at the blinds causing them to shut. Her morning routine is to go to the window and enjoy what the world could be and pretend that it is not what it truly is. But she lives on the 8th floor, Alicia doesn’t. So from the 3rd floor apartment window, all the neighbors who were out had seen Suffiyah in nothing but a pair of lacy boy short panties.

  Alicia keeps looking over at Suffiyah smirking.

  “Lee Lee, if you laugh I’m going to punch you in your eye.” Lee Lee bursts into laughter.

  “How you mad at me ‘cause you showed the neighbors those bullets you call nipples? Shit, I should be mad at you. You gonna have everyone walking pass looking at my window like one of those Red Light rooms in Amsterdam.” She makes light of the situation as they drive to Top Golf. “Then to add insult to injury you get downright gorgeous for tonight. Jeans amplifying your booty, titties spilling out your shirt, hair on fleek. Did you shave? Never mind, ten times out of ten you did, so coochie on fleek. I just have one question. Are we hoeing or golfing? Let me know now so I can be prepared.” Lee Lee’s humor is contagious, Suffiyah can’t help laughing.

  “Lee Lee, I swear your mother birthed a whole clown.”

  Benji pulls into the parking lot of Top Golf, which is as big as a warehouse. He’s nervous like a kid on his first date, maybe more so. The kid only has to impress and entertain one girl, he has to double that. He spots Suffiyah getting out of a Nissan Murano and finds a spot close to them. After spraying on his Bvlgari cologne, he takes a deep breath before getting out. He glances at his reflection in the car window. The green and yellow varsity jacket from Who R U fits as if it was custom m
ade solely for him. Underneath he wears a yellow Polo rugby with green writing. Dark blue Zara jeans fall onto his crisp construction Timberlands. In H&M he happened upon a hunter green skullcap that matched his jacket perfectly. Dentyne is keeping his breath pleasant. His outfit is on point and thanks to Bvlgari he smells excellent. He walks towards the women who have their backs to him.

  “Good evening, ladies?” They jump at the sound of his voice. “Sorry. I thought y’all saw me pull in.”

  “No, Lee Lee had me distracted,” Suffiyah says leaning in for a hug. “Benjamin. Alicia.” She makes the introductions formally. “Hurry up and shake hands before I freeze.”

  As they enter Top Golf, the ladies lead him straight to the bar. “Can we have two Apple Cirocs and apple juices?” Alicia orders. “And?” she adds while looking at Benji.

  “A double shot of Grey Goose and a bottle of water,” he replies. “Let me take y’all coats.” As he helps Suffiyah out of her trench coat, his jaw almost drops. Next he helps Alicia. “Damn, y’all look gorgeous. I feel like I’m not dressed right.”

  “Nah, you pulled your little ensemble off, especially with the reading glasses. You don’t smell too bad either,” Suffiyah compliments. “I see you showered since we last saw one another.”

  “Jokes huh? Say no more. I appreciate the compliments even though they came with a dig.” He pays for their drinks, and then two more rounds for the ladies.

  As they prepare to play golf Lee Lee speaks, “I see you only had one drink while we had three. What you up to, Casanova?”

  “Ha ha. Nothing at all. I just don’t overindulge anymore. There was stint in my life when things were so real for me, that I damn near lived in a bottle. Drugs have never really been my twist, feel me? So I used the alcohol to cope with the everyday pain of reality.”

  “Oh okay. Understandable. What high school did you go to?”

  “Westside.”

  “Did you love your school?”

  “A little bit. Why you ask that?” He smiles.